Today is the day :) #seriously?

        Sitting in the airport. Is this for real? Will I really be in Africa tomorrow? The place I left my heart 2 years ago? *pinch myself.* *ouch!* yup! I'm not dreaming. ;)    *pause for scream* AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! So many emotions going on right now I can't even keep up! Sadness, for leaving behind my loved ones. Excitement, for this new adventure. Anxiety, because well, I just do. ;)  Joy, for God getting me to this point. But total and complete anticipation! I've waited 2 years to be back here and here I am! I will be back in less than 24 hours! I can almost smell it! ;) 

         So now time for some thanks. I want to first thank my family. You are my rock. I know it's only 2 months but man! I am gonna miss y'all like crazy! We are very close adn it's gonna be hard not being there. But I have peace knowing that at this moment in my life, I am right where God wants me. Thank you for all your love and support. Mom, I haven't told you enough, but THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for all you have done to make this day possible. Dad, your little girl loves you SOOO much! Sure will miss yall this summer. Don't have too much fun on the lake without me ;) 

      Second, my friends. You guys mean the entire world to me! Friendships like ours are rare and hard to find. Our bonds can never be broken. Especially not by distance. I'm gonna miss y'all like crazy this summer!!! Geez!! I hope y'all have a "bonchin" summer! It'll be time to play in August! :) 

     Third, my church and pastor. You guys absolutely saved my life. 4 years ago I was welcomed with open arms and warm hearts. You have done nothing but support me and build me up. My walk with God is strong because of people like you. Thank you Brother Melton for your wisdom, guidance and support. But most of all your prayers. I sure am excited about what God is gonna do with Revival by Design! I will continue to pray for y'all everyday!

    And last, but certainly not least... All of my love and thanks goes to God. I absolutely would not be here without Him. He is ever faithful and stays true to His promises. God YOU are so GOOD!! Thank you for supplying me a way to get back to Africa. Thank you for the funds, the prayer warriors and for the call you have placed on my life. Help me to never, ever, ever take it for granted! You are worry of all the Glory, Honor and Praise. All of this is only through you. Thank you. 

      I love you all so very much! Next time I post a blog it will be from Africa! I'll update as often as I can Internet permitting. Please continue to pray for our safety, Gods anointing, and that His will be done on Togo this summer.

   Bless you, 

        Brandi  :)   

Troubles, Struggles, and Opened Eyes

         No one may care. No one may understand. But I feel like if I can share my struggles and things I've been fighting lately, it may be able to help someone else? Who knows. ;)

When preparing for a missions trip there are many "obstacles" that one may face. One may face financial struggles. Another fear. Someone could be fighting nightmares. Some health issues. Anxiety, panic attacks, maybe even underestimating yourself. I would be lying to you if I said none of these affected me. I would also be lying if I told you only a few have affected me. I have dealt with every single one of these issues, plus some while preparing for my missions trips. I would love to tell you I am perfectly ok and ready for Next Steps, but I too would be lying. But let me explain myself before you go thinking I'm crazy. ;) 

I believe that by dealing with every single one of these issues God is preparing me for a bigger purpose. By dealing with these health issues, I've learned to not be dependent on doctors, but by the Almighty Healer. By dealing with nightmares, I've come to realize that joy truly does come in the morning. By fighting anxiety, I've come to lean on God harder than I ever have before. By fighting fear, I have learned to place them all in Gods hands. And by underestimating myself, I have come to realize that I am a child of the King. I am "good enough". I am being prepared for a greater purpose and a life in missions. I am constantly fighting a battle that is growing me spiritually more than any teacher could ever teach me. I am staring fear in the face and saying "For God HAS NOT given me the spirit of "fear", but of POWER and of LOVE and of a SOUND MIND." I am telling myself everyday, "Greater is He who is in me, than he that is in the World." God may not come when I may think I need Him, but He always right on time. 

Am I excited about Next Steps? Well OF COURSE! But I can be honest with you and tell you preparing for a missions trip is not all skittles and rainbows. God has pushed me to my absolute last straw. My mind has been tested harder than it ever has before. I fight nightmares and fear and anxiety. But let me tell you, I would rather fight these things everyday of my life than be out of the will of God. I believe He first prepares the mind. Because ya see, thats where satan has his power. If he can get in your head, he has you. Satan will convince you, you will fail. He will break you and make you so fearful you won't want to do Gods work. He will convince you that you have health issues, so much to the point you believe it and are fearful of it. I pray everyday, "God put a brick wall of protection around my mind! Cleanse my thoughts and help me to see Your will. Lord open my eyes to satan's trick so that I may protect myself against them." Missions isn't glitz or glamour. It is a constant battle in the spiritual realm, and you HAVE TO BE READY TO FIGHT. 

"God make me a warrior of Your word. Prepare me by whatever means necessary. God I have to be ready for the missions field. Help me everyday to find myself a place in your word and time for prayer. Thank you for how strong you have made me during preparing for Next Steps. Lord I am not there yet, so please continue to work on my heart and mind. I ask that you protect our Next Steps team. I pray for safe travels. Protect us and our missionaries while on the field. Be a hedge around our minds as we fight this spiritual warfare battle. I know you have a harvest waiting in Africa. Be with us as we go in Your name. Amen" :) 

23 days and counting. :)

Until next folks, thank you for reading. 

-Brandi 

25 Days and a Surprise

25 days?! When did it get so close?! Am I ready? I hope so! Nervous? Of course ;) Excited? More than you’ll ever know! With it getting so close I am beginning to realize just how much I’m going to miss around here this summer. My friends and family seriously got me this weekend! They pulled off an amazing surprise going away party! Details below… :)

                I get a text from our youth twitter account that we were to meet at the church at 2:45 to go out and help with tornado cleanup. Great! I’m excited, let’s do it! So I get to the church early (because I’m early for everything) and then I am kid napped by AJ and Hahkeem. (Random) so with a quick adventure all over God’s green earth we finally get back to the church and they go running in before me. At this point I’m like ok?! What is going on? All these cars were at the church and so was my best friend Jenn’s from Oklahoma! WHAAA? Walk in, and “SURPRISE!!” It was so amazing! They got me good! They seriously out did themselves. It’s just proof of how I have the most amazing and best friends in the world! Thank you so much for all you guys did. You have no idea how much it means to me. Love you :) 

                I am still waiting for my visa from Togo to come in. Hopefully it’ll be here by next weekend. When that comes I am good and ready to take off! I leave Saturday May 31 at 10:30am. Now that it’s getting down to the wire I’m a little nervous. I’ve never been gone this long. When I start thinking about everything I’ll be missing around I get a little sad :/ but I quickly realize that I am where God wants me to be. He told me 2 years ago in Tanzania that my work wasn’t done in Africa. I am so blessed to be able to go back with Next Steps. I will be there for June and July. I am so excited to see what God has in store for Togo and our team. He truly has blessed this trip, even before we are there! I am SO thankful. Please keep our team in prayers. Pray for safe travels, safety wile overseas and that God will unify us for His greater purpose. I know He has a great plan and revival in store for Africa! Excited that I was chosen to be a part of it! :)

                Keep watching for updates J I will update as often as possible, internet permitting, from the field. So, until next time… 

-Brandi

 

Thankful doesn't even begin to cover it...

I’ve tried for several days now to figure out how to say thank you for all everyone has done to help make this mission’s trip possible. But honestly, there are no words. I can’t put into words how thankful I am for my church. You all have gone above and beyond anything I could have imagined. Your support and love mean the world to me. During the bowling tournament I took a second and looked around at all the people that had showed up to support and I nearly cried! You all are so amazing! I was able to raise over $600 for my missions trip that night. How amazing is that?! Seriously, thank you, thank you, and thank you. I love you. Here is me with the winners!

                So far this year God has given me the opportunity to speak at two churches about my mission’s journey. Both services went so good! Though beyond nervous at first, God intervened and it went smoothly. The congregations were both so generous with their giving’s!  Thank you Lord! And a HUGE thank you to the people of Smokey Lane Apostolic and Apostolic church! You have made my heart so happy. Thank you for your investment in the Kingdom. I know your sacrifices will be greatly blessed. J

                I was sitting here at work just thinking about how awesome God is. When starting to prepare for this trip I was so overwhelmed by the budget that I had a lot of doubt I would be able to raise it. (I can be honest with you) But then during that time I also thought how dare I doubt!  That’s not exactly putting my trust in God now is it? So I starting turning that doubt around and saying “Yes! I will raise this and beyond what I need!” and I’ll tell ya what, God started opening doors and working in ways I never imagined! But it had to start with me turning around that doubt. Then I started thinking about how undeserving I am of all the blessings God has given me. I’m not worthy of anything God has given me except by His grace! He is so merciful and forgiving! My prayers are that God continues to mold me and prepare me for this trip. “God prepare me by any means necessary! Completely break me if you have to! I clear the stage and give you total rein over my life! God you know the ways I need to be prepared, please continue to work in me and the people of Africa. Thank you!” (Now having a praise break in my office)

                I am about 82 days out from embarking on my new journey. My plane tickets were purchased! So I’m pretty much set! I’ll be flying out on May 31^st at about 11am our time, head to Chicago, then from there I’ll head to Belgium. I have about a 6 hour layover in Belgium then I go to The Ivory Coast and from there on to Togo. Talk about the long way around! 27 hours of travel and 4 plane rides later, I’ll finally be in Togo!  Ready to begin the ministry, ready to see the people, and more than ever ready for African church! Keep checking! I’ll be updating as frequently as possible from the field. It’s gonna be amazing! AHH! J  

 

Until next time...

<3 Brandi

Its been a while...

         I was looking over some old blog posts and noticed it was September since I posted! So I figured it would be nice to catch everyone up on whats been going on the past 3 months! So here it goes... ;)

         Around early September I got really sick with H Pylori. For those who don't know what this is, its pretty much a bacteria found in your stomach that causes and extra build up of acid. So I suffered with TERRIBLE heart burn. Which eventually led to Pleurisy. This meaning my lung cavities were inflamed and I could barely breath. I struggled with it for what felt like FORVER. But was honestly probably about 2 months. During this time I grew very nervous and filled with anxiety. The not being able to breathe is bad enough but then its as if the devil was filling my head with terrible thoughts and fears, and to be honest, I thought I was gonna die! Not being able to breathe terrified me! To the point where I had such a bad anxiety attacks I had to go to the emergency room. I was in and out of doctors offices for months with no hope of anything being able to help. This was very discouraging. I couldn't take it anymore! I was so crippled with the fear of not being able to breathe, that eventually it was all I could focus on! I spent countless money on doctors and medicines, but nothing helped. I slept in a recliner for nearly 3 weeks! But as always, God had a plan. I was just to wrapped up in this emotional battle to see it. You see, I hadn't been depending on God through all of that. I was depending on doctors and medicines and old time remedies to heal me off this, and the prayers of other people, that I simply didn't ask. Now of course I prayed out of fear, but that wasn't sincere. I finally started praying sincerely, and slowly but surely I felt like I was able to breathe normally again! My symptoms still aren't 100% gone, but God will handle that. I'm no longer gonna be crippled by fear of these things. The devil was hard at work trying to put fear in my life. This all happened right after I found out I was accepted for Next Steps. What a game you play Satan! Distractions, distractions, distractions. Well, your not getting me again! ;)

        Now to my missions journey ;) This trip is costing me $7000. Yes, thats a lot of money. Yes, its stressing me out. Yes, I'm scarred I may not raise it. But I'm trying NOT to dwell on those thoughts! Satan will tell you you can't do anything. But my faith in God, and God himself tells me I can do anything! Fundraising isn't going exactly according to plan, but if God is in it, He will provide. I have no doubt in my mind that I'm suppose to be in Africa. Africa is where my heart. Africa is where my future is. Africa means everything to me. I am willing and ready to do whatever it takes to get there! Even if that means begging on a street corner for change! I have a few fundraisers lined out, a bowling tournament (more info to come) t-shirts, yard sales, and next Sunday I am speaking at Smokey Lane Apostolic. I'm a little nervous, but my mother made a pretty good point. She said, "this is what your gonna have to do when you become a full time missionary." She's so wise ;) I honestly never thought about like that. And boy did I like the sound of those words! Full Time Missionary! I can hardly wait! 

   

       There will officially be 3 girls representing Africa on the missions field this summer! Isn't that amazing?! My friend Courtney Boyd is going on Next Steps with me, and then another girl she knows. We are so ready! Ready to win souls! Ready for some church! (ain't no church like church in Africa) And all in general just ready to be back. The thought of being back in Africa soon is sometimes the only that keeps me going. I love Arkansas. This is home, and will always be home. But I'm ready for something more. Ready to get my ministry started in Africa. It is so hard explaining that to people sometimes. But my mind is always wondering to Africa and it's people. I feel like everyday I spend here is an opportunity I'm missing over there. Now of course I know its all in due time, and good things come to those wait. And patience is a virtue. But man! My burden for that country is so big! It's getting hard to contain it over here! :) I often have to remind myself that everyday is a learning oppurtunity and that everyday God is training and preparing me for my future over there. So I'm ok with waiting, I'm ok with being here. For now... ;) 

        Please keep reading! I know this post didn't contain much but I promise I'll keep up better with updating! :)  If you didn't see my last post my next trip to Africa is planned for June and July of this summer. 139 days left! AHHHH! :) 

Next Steps 2014!

It’s really happening! AHH! I was accepted for Next Steps 2014 in Togo, Africa! I get to go back and work on my ministry! AHH! I get to return to the place I left my heart last year. And not only do I get to return. I will be there for 2 whole months! How amazing?! The Lord truly answers prayers!

                Our last day In Tanzania we got some time in the church in the Esso Village. We locked the doors and closed the windows and got some personal time with God. This was time to reflect on the trip, pray and ask God for direction on our life, and just sit and bask in His glory. After 12 days of constant ministry and travel I can honestly say this alone time in the church was perfect. He told me “your work isn’t done here.” And Sister Smoak hugged me as we were departing and said, “I’ll be seeing you again” what confirmation!  As I sat and reflected on my short time in Tanzania I realized my life had been more affected in those 12 short days than any other time in my life. Every person, every home, every road, every service, they had completely changed me. And I’ll never be the same again, Thank God for that! How selfish I was! It took seeing one of the poorest countries in the World to realize that. What really brought me to my knees was seeing how giving they were. They literally would have given their last meal to someone in need. For a people who don’t even know where their next meal will come from, they are the most generous people I have ever had the pleasure to meet. How lucky I am to get to spend 2 months back in Africa helping people just like the Tanzanians.        

                I will be in Lome, Togo, West Africa this time with the Next Steps group. Not sure of anyone else going yet, but it will be a group of UPC young people who have a hunger for World Missions. I mean, seriously?!  What have I done to be so lucky! How the Lord has blessed me! 2 months on the field. I think back to all we accomplished in 12 days, just imagine what can be done in 2 months! So many services, youth camps, family camps and kids crusades! I seriously can’t wait! Can’t you tell? ;) With Next Steps we will be doing everything from helping in the local churches, to building churches and helping in the bible college! We have an intense 3 week training course then the remainder 5 weeks will be spent applying what we have learned and helping wherever we can. I just can’t imagine what God has in store for us!

                Now of course with any opportunity like this comes an opportunity to give. I’ll need to raise $7000 for this trip. Sometimes I look at the number and think dear Lord! How am I going to do this? But He quickens me and says “I got you this far, I won’t leave you now.” I’m thankful for His peace. Now just to come up with fundraising ideas! And save, save, save! I have a Go Fund Me account for anyone interested in giving… or I can take personal checks. Just remember all donations ARE tax deductible! I thank you so much for your support and support for His Kingdom! It means the World to me!

Go Fund Me link:  www.gofundme.com/brandismission 

"They shall dream dreams..."

Yes, another post about a dream. But my experience was too amazing not to share ;) 

Last night I had a dream and I was with my family.  Mom, Dad, siblings, step dad and my nana and papa. I was showing them around this city. They have never been there so it was almost like I was giving them a tour of somewhere so familiar to me, like it was my home. As I was showing them certain places around the city its like each place had an important meaning or purpose on my life. Like something big had happened there. They were so amazed that I had so easily fallen in love with this place. From the filthy dirt roads and little shacks that lined the road, to every mud stained face we passed. Everything was important to me. During this trip my families lives were completely transformed. They finally understood why I had fallen in love with the place and why I had worked so hard to get back there. They understood and they supported. As I watched them take off from the long, dirt runway I realized it might be a long time till I see them again. It made me sad for a moment, but I was comforted by knowing I was exactly where God needed me to be, and I wanted to be there. As I woke up thinking about the dream I realized I recognized those dirty streets and little shacks. And all the places that were significant to me were places God had performed amazing miracles. It was Africa, and I had fallen in love with every piece of it. Maybe it was God confirming things for me, maybe He just wanted to give me a little peek into the future ;) whatever it was, it was comforting, it was a sure thing, it was a perfect fit. I seriously can't hardly wait to return to the place I left my heart last summer! This made me all the more ready and willing to work toward Next Steps 2014! It's gonna be a long 10 months.